Common Questions on Domestic Violence


  • Am I experiencing abuse?

    When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to determine if what you’re experiencing is domestic violence/abuse.

    The common depiction of abuse is black eyes and bruises. That happens, but, it’s important to know domestic violence can take other forms like emotional or psychological, sexual, financial and/or spiritual abuse.

    We've prepared a toolkit to help you understand the various forms abuse can take so you can better assess your relationship and understand your situation. You can download the toolkit here, or by using the pink DOWNLOAD TOOLKIT button above.

    Inside you’ll find links to helpful articles, recommended books, danger assessment tools, checklists, relevant survivor survey results, support communities and how to find help.

    Remember, abuse happens to all types of people regardless of age, gender, race, economic or social status, or sexual orientation. And remember, abuse is never the victim’s fault, and help is always available.

  • Why do abusers abuse?

    If you find yourself with an abusive partner, it is not uncommon to wonder: why are they choosing to behave and act as they do? 

    There is no excuse for domestic violence or abuse. Abuse is one partner exerting control and power over the other. But how can someone who says they love you abuse you? What are some of the different control tactics? Should you hold out any hope an abuser can change? 

    We've prepared a toolkit to help you understand why perpetrators abuse, and the indicators of potential abuse. You can download the toolkit here, or by using the pink DOWNLOAD TOOLKIT button above.

    Inside you’ll find links to helpful articles, recommended books, checklists, relevant survivor survey results, support communities and how to find help.

    Remember, there is no justification for an abusive partner. 

  • What about my kids?

    If you’re a parent with an abusive partner, the safety, well-being and future of your children are top of mind.

    We've prepared a toolkit to help you navigate leaving an abusive partner when kids are involved. You can download the toolkit here, or by using the gray DOWNLOAD TOOLKIT button above.

    Inside you’ll find links to helpful articles, recommended books, danger assessment tools, checklists, relevant survivor survey results, support communities and how to find help.

    Remember, even if violence is not directed toward children, research indicates that 90% of them are aware of it even if you think they are not. 

  • I know someone who is being abused, what do i do?

    When you think a friend is being abused, or they confide in you that abuse is occurring, what should you do? How can you best help? 

    Helping isn't as straightforward as many think. But, never underestimate how essential your support can be. 

    We've prepared a toolkit to help you understand the various forms abuse can take so you can better assess your relationship and understand your situation. You can download the toolkit here, or by using the gray DOWNLOAD TOOLKIT button above.

    Inside you’ll find links to helpful articles, recommended books, checklists, relevant survivor survey results, support communities and how to find help.

    Remember, above all, when faced with this situation the best thing you can do is listen, judgment free. 

  • I’m ready to leave..now what?

    When you decide to escape domestic violence, it may feel impossible to know where to start. You're ready to leave– now what? 

    There are a variety of things to consider when you make the decision to leave an abuser. From safety planning to orders of protection and everything in-between, the task can feel overwhelming. 

    We've prepared a toolkit to make the process of leaving feel within reach, more manageable, and for added peace of mind and security. You can download the toolkit here, or by using the gray DOWNLOAD TOOLKIT button above.

    Inside you’ll find links to helpful articles, recommended books, checklists, relevant survivor survey results, support communities and how to find help.

    Remember, domestic violence advocates are available via national and local hotlines to help you plan your escape and your future. 



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